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The Harrow (Keelhauling: A Triptych)

from Die Alone by Silence and Secrecy

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about

Fantasies about committing or being the victim of violence are not uncommon, nor are fantasies about despised individuals. There are, after all, fine lines between the different species of cortical arousal. Thus.

Each part of this song began as a different song, the first two originating in melodies that I had scratched out years before for entirely different purposes. Both, however, seemed to cotton to similar tunings and "keys," and had similar feels, so there we go. The timbres of the wineglasses also notched themselves into the tonal framework with uncanny ease, so in they went. The final section was more of an experiment in chord progression, but with a little work and some appropriate soundplay... yeah. And then we have the "growls," for which I will make no excuses, save that Andy Serkis' reasoning behind the Gollum voice comes from the same place.

lyrics

i.

I walk upstairs with hesitation,
holding my breath.
I pace left to right
and back again
across the locked room.
Dirty floor seems like a moonlit desert.
I remember your voice in my ear,
and your hands on my throat,
and your teeth in my skin.
Some pleasures are tortures:
The hatefulness of your smile;
your laughter at cruel jokes;
the hollow sensation
of flesh against flesh—
like bone breaking,
like a razor,
like a kitchen knife,
like a storm on the sea,
like keelhauling.
To dream of being ripped apart:
The highest of all exaltations.
Come in unto me,
and know my body bled;
I come in unto you
and cannot sleep any longer,
for fear of dreaming of you.

And I wish I could die,
and I wish that I had killed myself,
and I wish that I had cut your throat,
and I wish that I had slit my wrists—
I wish I could empty my veins of you.
Do it again.

ii.

Breathe with me.
Drink with me.

Close your eyes.
Empty your mind.
Close your mouth.
Empty your chest.

I have no ill intentions.
Do you want me to have ill intentions?

iii.

[…]

credits

from Die Alone, released May 7, 2016

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about

Silence and Secrecy image

Silence and Secrecy Pennsylvania

Purveyor of fine musical curios, grotesques and arabesques since 1 January 2014. Mostly just one weirdo in a literal attic.

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